[clug] IPv6 for home

[Scott Ferguson]

On 30/12/11 11:44, Michael Still wrote:
> Dear Internet. I am confused by your new fangled IPv6. Personally, I
> think we should have jumped to IPv8, but I was overruled on that. 

Great idea!  Marketing love the V8 angle and are filing a patent
application.

To show our appreciation we would like to offer you the ability to jump
the head of the complaint queue when next you have a problem with your
internet.
Just quote your valued customer ID 10T to our highly skilled and
motivated DigiTel staff at BigPond, or the Julia Ross staff at Telstra,
and shave 3 hours off your wait.

Please have your passport and credit card details ready for our operators.


> So, given the current schmozzle we find ourselves in, please advise:
> 
>  - I have a home network. Its done with cable and radio waves. Some of
> the cables are blue, and some are gray if that matters. One of them is
> green I think.

You should cut the green cables immediately and reduce the CO2 layer.

> 
>  - I have a DSL modem. Because Telstra are evil, it only gets 3.3mbit to
> the Internet, but that doesn't seem relevant. 

Slow internet is usually due to line corrosion - have you tried WD-40?


> However, it does claim to
> get an IPv6 address, which is exciting.
> 
>  - I have a machine on the network (not the DSL modem) which hands out
> IPv4 DHCP leases, as well as acting as a DNS server.


You will definitely need a DSL modem.
You should speak to our customer service representatives about our range
of quality DHCP leases. We have a large range in different colours.

> 
> I'd like IPv6 to just magically work for the home network, and be able
> to route packets to the Internets. I'd also like to keep DNS resolution
> going via the home DNS server if possible, as DNS latency is a big
> performance problem for me.
> 
> So, how should I do that?


If you wish to connect more than one computer to the internet you should
arrange to have an additional line installed - or purchase the IPV6 NAT
service from our premium partner McHappee.

Please place your orders by email to:-
moochersandlooters at lazywhiners.net.awww

> 
> - Should I run a DHCPv6 server on the DHCP machine? Does that really
> mean running two copies of ISC dhcpd?
> 
> - Should I obtain an address range for use in my house, or should I just
> use the netblock Internode hands my modem?

No! You should do nothing. You are not qualified and may cause yourself
an injury.


> 
> Please do my homework for me. I'm obsessed with the desire to experience
> animated turtles, but not obsessed enough to have done any research at all.
> 
> Hugs and kisses,
> Mikal


Hi Mikal,
          many intelligent, motivated, and productive people ask the
same questions and make the same reasonable demands!

Please note that for the sooper speeds needed for modern families you
should upgrade to our premium ISDN service. Available at any Telstra
shop, Harvey Norman or Dick Smith outlet by simply leaving your wallet
on the counter.

Should you have any more queries please address them to me directly:-

Alice Readon - Moochers Advocate
atlas at shrugged.awg

Sincerely, Teh Internet

P.S. We encourage you to complain about Gnome 3, KDE4, young people,
couples kissing, lack of community consultation about Open Source
projects developed by volunteers, and imaginary transgressions by Google
(like shutting down Google+ accounts for fake names and fingers).